Money just changed everything.

Can I please win the jackpot? I just wanna enjoy that security of not needing a paycheque for just a lil bit. Not all of us can be in headlines n shit. Media attention good or bad, I'd take it.


I just wanna go to the moon or something and light off fireworks


I need to just kill everything I do. I'm a fool for workin' at 9.60 an hour. That can only feel good if you're livin in the Philipines. You think, you can live fine off of lke 4,000 a month but you know in reality that can't get you much. That can't get you more than you need, you know what I mean? And nowadays everything we need is everything we want. I'd rather blog than eat. I'd rather go drop a few g's than sleep. I'd probably stop showering for a few days if it meant getting a brand new Benz. So I don't really think we know, like, where to draw the line with this shit anymore.

There's so many parts to life and it's so complex. Usually we pick one aspect and just go off it it. I've just got every single part of it running through my mind at once and I don't know what to make it of. I don't know what to make of right now or the future. I hate waiting for this shit to finally come up in my mind and when it does I always forget to put it down on paper so I just end up forgetting what I just thought and what I was going to do.


I think out of everything I just said though, the real good part about life for me is the sky. Looking up at the stars right, and the moon. You know how you feel when you want something SO bad but you can't ever, ever have it? That's how I feel about space and time. I will never figure it out. Not through a wormhole, not through a black hole.. not through books, science, education, or anything. Just experience. And it's sad knowing that we don't get to experience all that we want in life. Do you think I have 4 billion just laying round to go to the moon? Probably not, yet.

So again I've just gotta keep dreaming and figure out away around this and try to get something I want that I can actually work towards reaching. Something fullfilling. Something that agrees with me like.. something, mutual.

Same goes as finding someone because I'm feeling sorta like this isn't happening quick enough or as well as I'd like it to. I just need to find some glue here to hold shit together or a new wifi connection because for the past 2 years I'm just feeling completely disconnected from reality and everything.

I guess we're all just a little bit like the moon when the world can see half of us.